World’s Largest Penis Owner Breaks Arm in a Very Unfortunate Slip

36.8 cm — not a flatscreen TV, not a Subway footlong, but Matt Barr’s personal “burden of pride.”

Walking is a challenge, sitting is a puzzle, showering is a circus act. And then came the plot twist: spilled gel on the floor, blocked view thanks to his “oversized lightsaber,” slip, crash — boom! Two bones broken.

Moral of the story: sometimes it’s better to carry a pocket knife than a medieval lance.